It’s really hard to understand people sometimes, and remember that my whole life is about figuring out people and analyzing them, even those I hate or used to hate. I need to experience all the differences available in this world. I want to be the old man, the princess, the murderer, the police, the bully, the stalker… I want to be it all, to feel it all, to understand it all, so I could stop wonder about it all.

I also noticed that the individual’s way of perceiving other people can pretty easily be seen as merely subjective impressions. Mark, by the way, how impressions are not seen as objectively as perceptions. I never cease to be amazed about the people you think know you by now, absolutely misinterpret emotions that are in your sole spotlight. The more you try to act in a way that you are who you are - or too less for that matter - the more disbelief it creates. Either way, this pretending of the ego always tends to work against you. I am pretty damned self-aware or self concious enough to realize that either road you walk, it’ll never be the one that satisfies the one within you.

Childishness often implies the reason itself, but it’s not always a bad thing if the reason however does have a strong point. I understand people do things without any reason once in a while, but they don’t keep doing them. Sometimes we know why, or the reason may sometimes be in lack of our understanding. It’s merely hard to accept how we don’t always seem to be able to figure everything out.

Take a moment… ask yourself why you are doing what you are doing. Explain it to yourself, and to me. Just do it.

Because, in the end, it’s a pretty wasteful motive to just getting a bit of revenge. Revenge, it pretty much seems a hollow goal to devote your life towards, I’d say.